renungan kebangun

Kadang aku bertanya signifikansi aku ada di dunia itu apa? Merupakan hak prerogatif Tuhan ya menciptakan aku ada di dunia ini. Kalau aku hanya butiran debu yang sadar akan kematiannya setiap hari, untuk apa aku ada dan mengalami semua ini? Ngeri nggak sih 38 tahun masih nanya kayak gini? Kukira 38 tahun udah jadi setingkat wali songo. Ini wali murid aja belum.

Ah nikmatnya jadi butiran debu, bisa nulis sesuka hati. Coba aku presiden, udah di-doxing laman virtual ini. Mumpung masih butiran debu, aku bisa berkarya sesuka hati tanpa khawatir ada yang suka atau tidak. Lagipula, kebanyakan orang yang signifikan di dunia saat ini adalah para bajingan.

Comments

It Has Been A Lot!

Wow, where should I start? So my comeback to dance class after a month break (sebulan aje dibahas...gimana lebih? Udah jadi buku keleus :D) had been a wild ride. Right away rehearsal for a performance and coordinating an event at the same time. Berto gave me this job from IDF, where I worked as P.I.C for Dance Writing Workshop. My girl IKAN said why am I taking the job if I am so busy? The answer is clear: I need to pay college. Ikan said she can just lend me money and I can focus on my thesis. God, bless this human that is my best friend. That's very kind and thoughtful of her. Anyway, I took the job so I was running 2 events at the same time. One in Cikini, Central Jakarta and one in SOM, South Tangerang. I became an adept Commuter Line user. I no longer mistaken peron 1 with peron 2 and silly things like that, like not knowing which gate I should enter after scanning my card to enter the peron. Duh. Duh 100x. I wasn't particularly on diet but I really didn't want to ea...

What is happiness? It sounds like a snack.

I would, like usually, open this post by saying "Things are crazy". Yes, I don't know are things really crazy or is it just me. I think it's the latter. Life appears as surprises to me. And I act like a door, opening this tunnel, closing another one. I don't feel dull, and I can't say my days have been dull for they are full with challenges. But I have been so alone. This also sounds weird. Since when that I'm not alone? I always pull myself back from any social event. I hang out alone. I guess the last time I had a good time outside the house/office/campus with another human being was the last Saturday in January, so it's a month ago. It is true that if I just ask, I will get people willing to go with me. But I am the pickiest picky pick ever because most of the times when I don't pick, I get bored with dull conversations, or a view of someone watching his/her phone like there's nothing else to see. So all this time I hang out alone. Mos...

yang hilang dan jadi debu

ada sesuatu yang diam-diam kupercaya walau ia hilang ditelan bisingnya Jakarta: Islam ada cara hidup yang sederhana, menawarkan kesadaran untuk mampu mengendalikan kecepatan, dengan disiplin lima kali dalam sehari, dan tidak lebih lama dari basa-basi ada cara bertutur yang tegas dan disetujui tubuh, istighfar membuatku sadar, bahwa yang sakit bisa pulih tasbih menunduk-daguku, bahwa seniman itu sebuah entitas hamdalah hangatkan bahuku, ada yang Maha kendali di atas kendaliku

Forever Aozora

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